is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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