haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I will be naked everywhere
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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