honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Success! We fucked roommates!
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
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