is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
