the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
