sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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