It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
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