dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
