i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
you will always have a special place in my vag
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
