dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
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