thus making me awesome and them whores
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
Your message has been received by an unknown user. Picture verification required.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
