he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize
