we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
