I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
