at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize