Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize