I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
