I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
i barfeds in our rink
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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