All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Randomize
