Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
