and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
