That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Randomize
