you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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