Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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