I wish i was in the wii world.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize