she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Randomize