Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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