Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
