U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
