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just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
