I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
