Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
