I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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