I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
