So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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