white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
