Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
