Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
