so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
