Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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