cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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