The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
