I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize
