Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
