I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
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