I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize