i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
