she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize
