Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Randomize