Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
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