wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
